Stay At Home Mum v Working Mum

I've recently gone back to work after being off on maternity leave with my son and I still keep wondering what's best,  a Stay at Home Mum or a Working Mum?

There are always pros and cons with everything, but with this decision there's the added parental guilt to take into account as well.

Pros of a Stay at Home Mum :

• By choosing to be a stay at home mum you're able to be there for them 24 hours a day, and if they've had a bad night you don't have to go to that all important early morning meeting looking like you've been dragged through a hedge backwards! Mind you, if you've had a bad night then you might end up looking like that anyway!
• If they're ill, which can be a regular occurrence once they start to socialise with other children at the various playgroups and baby clubs, you'll be able to nurse them until they're better, without having to worry about what your boss will say as you've already been off a few times this month will a sick child
• You're able to do all sorts of fun things with them, and spend real quality time when with them rather than just seeing them for an hour or two in the evening before it's bed time
• You don't have to folk out thousands every year for child care in a nursery or hand them over to friends or family every morning

Cons of a Stay at Home Mum :

• Unless your other half has a relatively large income then you'll probably have to make some sacrifices, how small or large these are will obviously vary according to circumstance
• Unless you can establish yourself within a group of friends at the many playgroups or baby clubs then you may find that not working can quite isolating
• You may find that you talk non-stop to your off half when they come home of an evening as you may not have much adult company, if any, all day
• Unless you can wangle a career break from work you may end up sacrificing your career by taking time out.

• If you decide to re-enter the workplace again in a few years time the chances are you'll have to start at the bottom again, or at least a good bit further down the ladder from where you were when you left

Pros of being a Working Mum :

• The main, and obvious one, is that you get paid at the end of the month!
• You can have your lunch in peace.
• Drink a hot cup of tea whilst it's still hot
• You get the chance to converse with other adults, and even about non-baby related stuff!
• Your own identity reappears, you’re not just someone’s mum any more

Cons of Being a Working Mum :

• You've got to hand you child over to either, if you're lucky, friends or family to child-mind, or to a nursery
• Your salary will take a massive hit if you've to enrol your child in a nursery
• Whoever is looking after you child may not do things the way that you would like them to be done
• You don't actually see that much of your child during the week, by the time you've picked them up from the nursery it's usually dinner time, bath and bed
• If you've had a bad night you've still got to go into work the next day looking fresh and ready to tackle the tasks for that day

Decisions, decisions, decisions...

Once you've made that all important decision, you then will have to take into account that you really need to make time for yourselves as a couple. That doesn't have to be an expensive thing to do though -  watching a DVD whilst snuggle up on the sofa, or having a ready meal with a glass of wine once the wee one's in bed

Everyone have to make the choice about being a working mum or a stay at home mum, based on what’s best for their own family and circumstances.